“I Thirst for You” - Mother Theresa.

 ”Behold, I stand at the door and knock… (Rev. 3, 20)

It is true. I stand at the door of your heart, day and night. Even when you are not listening, even when you doubt it could be Me, I am there. I await even the smallest sign of your response, even the least whispered invitation that will allow Me to enter.

And I want you to know that whenever you invite Me, I do come – always, without fail. Silent and unseen I come, but with infinite power and love, and bringing the many gifts of My Spirit. I come with My mercy, with My desire to forgive and heal you, and with a love for you beyond your comprehension – a love every bit as great as the love I have received from the Father (“As much as the Father has loved me, I have loved you…” (Jn. 15:10) I come - longing to console you and give you strength, to lift you up and bind all your wounds. I bring you My light, to dispel your darkness and all your doubts. I come with My power, that I might carry you and all your burdens; with My grace, to touch your heart and transform your life; and My peace I give to still your soul.

I know you through and through. I know everything about you. The very hairs of your head I have numbered. Nothing in your life is unimportant to Me. I have followed you through the years, and I have always loved you – even in your wanderings. I know every one of your problems. I know your needs and your worries. And yes, I know all your sins. But I tell you again that I love you – not for what you have or haven’t done – I love you for you, for the beauty and dignity My Father gave you by creating you in His own image. It is a dignity you have often forgotten, a beauty you have tarnished by sin. But I love you as you are, and I have shed My Blood to win you back. If you only ask Me with faith, My grace will touch all that needs changing in your life, and I will give you the strength to free yourself from sin and all its destructive power.

I know what is in your heart – I know your loneliness and all your hurts – the rejections, the judgments, the humiliations, I carried it all before you. And I carried it all for you, so you might share My strength and victory. I know especially your need for love – how you are thirsting to be loved and cherished. But how often have you thirsted in vain, by seeking that love selfishly, striving to fill the emptiness inside you with passing pleasures – with the even greater emptiness of sin. Do you thirst for love? “Come to Me all you who thirst…” (Jn. 7: 37). I will satisfy you and fill you. Do you thirst to be cherished? I cherish you more than you can imagine – to the point of dying on a cross for you.

I Thirst for You. Yes, that is the only way to even begin to describe My love for you. I THIRST FOR YOU. I thirst to love you and to be loved by you – that is how precious you are to Me. I THIRST FOR YOU. Come to Me, and I will fill your heart and heal your wounds. I will make you a new creation, and give you peace, even in all your trials I THIRST FOR YOU. You must never doubt My mercy, My acceptance of you, My desire to forgive, My longing to bless you and live My life in you. I THIRST FOR YOU. If you feel unimportant in the eyes of the world, that matters not at all. For Me, there is no one any more important in the entire world than you. I THIRST FOR YOU. Open to Me, come to Me, thirst for Me, give me your life – and I will prove to you how important you are to My Heart.

Don’t you realize that My Father already has a perfect plan to transform your life, beginning from this moment? Trust in Me. Ask Me every day to enter and take charge of your life. – and I will. I promise you before My Father in heaven that I will work miracles in your life. Why would I do this? Because I THIRST FOR YOU. All I ask of you is that you entrust yourself to Me completely. I will do all the rest.

Even now I behold the place My Father has prepared for you in My Kingdom. Remember that you are a pilgrim in this life, on a journey home. Sin can never satisfy you, or bring the peace you seek. All that you have sought outside of Me has only left you more empty, so do not cling to the things of this life. Above all, do not run from Me when you fall. Come to Me without delay. When you give Me your sins, you gave Me the joy of being your Savior. There is nothing I cannot forgive and heal; so come now, and unburden your soul.

No matter how far you may wander, no matter how often you forget Me, no matter how many crosses you may bear in this life; there is one thing I want you to always remember, one thing that will never change. I THIRST FOR YOU – just as you are. You don’t need to change to believe in My love, for it will be your belief in My love that will change you. You forget Me, and yet I am seeking you every moment of the day – standing at the door of your heart and knocking. Do you find this hard to believe? Then look at the cross, look at My Heart that was pierced for you. Have you not understood My cross? Then listen again to the words I spoke there – for they tell you clearly why I endured all this for you: “I THIRST…”(Jn 19: 28). Yes, I thirst for you – as the rest of the psalm – verse I was praying says of Me: “I looked for love, and I found none…” (Ps. 69: 20). All your life I have been looking for your love – I have never stopped seeking to love you and be loved by you. You have tried many other things in your search for happiness; why not try opening your heart to Me, right now, more than you ever have before.

Whenever you do open the door of your heart, whenever you come close enough, you will hear Me say to you again and again, not in mere human words but in spirit. “No matter what you have done, I love you for your own sake Come to Me with your misery and your sins, with your troubles and needs, and with all your longing to be loved. I stand at the door of your heart and knock. Open to Me, for I THIRST FOR YOU…”

Lobsters, not crabs.

My revelation this week has been that we just don’t understand God at all. We literally cannot comprehend how wonderful and awesome he is, or how mighty His love is, because He is just too big for us to ascertain.

We try and place Him in a box, and impose our human limitations upon Him, but he is God.

I know I have this revelation a lot, but we just don’t get it.

See the Bible tells us again and again just how incredible God is, and all the things that He can and does do, but if I’m honest I can get a bit sceptical. I really want to believe it, but sometimes, actually, I’m quite happy with my little comfort zone. To fully surrender my life to God, literally all of it, and to live by His quiet whisper terrifies me. But it shouldn’t.

This attitude is not ok. It’s understandable, of course, but there is so much more to life, and to God. Perfect love casts out fear. We get so caught up in the here and now that we forget how God loved us so much that He rescued us in our brokenness to spend all eternity with Him.

Because He delights in us.

My friend Clare (who is wonderful) and I were talking about this tonight. God is passionately persuing us with his outrageous love, and so often we don’t realise it because we’re too busy running sideways, getting distracted. Like crabs.

Crabs go sideways.

Personally, I think God wants us to be more like lobsters. Lobsters (according to Jim) go forwards. Not sideways. Forwards. That way, when God is passionately pursuing us, we run straight to Him. Not sideways, dodging Him because it’s more comfortable, but straight into His loving arms that are desperate to enfold themselves around us.

We can do all things through Christ who strengthens us.

We, as the church, are Christ’s bride. How beautiful an image is that? Being at the age where it’s acceptable to get married, marriage is something that I think about a lot. Maybe being the bride of Christ is an image that doesn’t sit well with guys, but anybody who watches Friends will know that lobsters mate for life. God wants us. And not just for now, or for a Sunday morning, but for all eternity.

So basically, let’s be lobsters, not crabs.

Because He loves us, and that is enough.

x

Remember Me, Rescue Me. Child Prostitution in Brazil.

*Do not read me if you do not want to be disturbed. The statistics are horrible and each one is a life.*

Anyone who has spoken to me for more than 5 minutes knows how I feel about street children and people who have been trafficked. Their stories break my heart. I can’t get them out of my mind. I have met street kids in Romania, Uganda and Rwanda. Different names, different circumstances, but the same harsh reality.

My latest heart break is Brazil.

UNICEF estimates that there are around 500,000 children involved in the sex industry in Brazil. And I literally mean children. 8 year olds selling their bodies to truck drivers in order to earn enough money to sustain their families. 11 year olds charging 4 reals a time (the equivalent of £1.47).

Brazil is considered to have the second worst Child sex trafficking record in the world, beaten only by Thailand. There are more than 240 organised sex trafficking routes throughout the country. Sex tourism is a booming industry. The worst is the BR-116 motorway, along which at least 262 child prostitution places exist. That’s just one motorway.

These children, these girls, they are more than just numbers. They are precious daughters of our creator God, and He is weeping over them. He has not forsaken them, He has not forgotten them. He is there with them.

It makes me so angry. And I don’t really get angry. So imagine how it must be making God, their Heavenly Father feel.

Last night I finished reading a book called “Remember Me, Rescue Me” by Matt Roper. I wept my way through the last 100 pages. Having worked with street girls in the favelas of Brazil, Matt Roper travelled around the country researching child prostitution. His book is wonderful, but it is not an easy read.

I literally had nightmares last night that I was in Brazil and unable to save these girls from being trafficked. All I want to do is pack in the degree, jump on a plane, and go love those girls. To give them a way out. To care for them when everyone else seems to have rejected them. To try and be like Jesus to them.

God is just and He will not forget these girls. They are so precious to Him.

Meninadanca is the project Matt Roper set up. Click on the link and have a look. One day, I will go there.

Pray. Because our God is mighty. x

A Plea for Blankets.

Hello.

Do you have a spare fleecy blanket that is feeling unloved in your cupboard? You know the one I mean - the one that is slightly faded or only comes out when you’re REALLY cold but otherwise just sits on the shelf feeling alone. I have an idea that will give your blanket a sense of purpose in life.

Every Friday a bunch of friends and I head to Newcastle armed with some soup and some sandwiches. We wander about looking for our homeless friends, and sit down to have a chat. Sometimes they just take some food and carry on, but other times we’re priviledge to learn their life stories (or get a cookery lesson like we did tonight!)

Occasionally we take some scarves or gloves or blankets, but tonight we didn’t have enough. A few guys asked us if we’ll bring them blankets next week, and I’d love to keep my promise. Back in January I slept out on the streets of Durham, partly for the experience, and partly to raise money and awareness for the street boys of Uganda that I’ve worked with. But homelessness isn’t just an issue in Africa. It’s something people are forced to cope with every night here in Durham, in Newcastle, in Belfast. Trust me, it’s cold on the pavement.

So if you fancy donating a blanket, it would really make David’s night. If you don’t have one, or don’t want to, that’s ok. I’m not trying to guilt trip anyone into parting from their lovely fleeciness.

But if you do fancy grabbing a blanket from tescos/a charity shop/your attic, and flinging it my way (preferably after paying for it!), please do get in touch. Even if you’re not in Durham, I’ll work something out.

H x

PS…if you want to come with us on a friday night, get in touch too :) x

Sleeping Rough in Durham

2:45am – the clubbers finally gone, we settle down for the night.
3am – lorry deliveries begin.
5am – incessant stream of lorries and taxis replaced by street sweeper.
5:45am – rain starts to drizzle.
6am – rain stops, setting up of carousel begins.
6:45am – Durham Market begins set up.
7am – We give up and get up.

Such was our experience of sleeping rough. On Friday 20^th January, 7 friends and I exchanged our warm beds for the chill of Durham Market Place in a bid to raise money for street kids in Uganda. The challenge was this: for 24 hours, we would live like street children. No money, no provisions for food, no bed. Just a sleeping bag, some cardboard boxes, and faith in humanity. We would spend the night sleeping on the street and the day collecting cans and scrap metal in an attempt to earn some money.

Having been to Uganda several times and recently being involved with the homeless in Newcastle, I was keen to see what the experience would be like. “Sleeping” on the street is definitely the wrong term to use - “lying awake” is much more accurate. Not so much because of the cold (or the rain!) but because of the constant noise that pervaded the night. As soon as one delivery finished, another one arrived. I think half an hour’s respite was all I enjoyed, and even then I was chilled to the bone. And there’s no privacy on the streets either. Despite our ironically-advertisement-emblazoned fencing hiding us away, anyone who wanted to come and talk to us or just stare at us had a right to do so. There was nothing we could do to stop them. On the streets you have no place to call your own.

Staying in the market place on Saturday was also a challenge. Whilst it was nice to escape the library and ignore my degree, the cold and the tiredness began to set in as the afternoon dragged by. It was extremely comforting to know that soon we could return to our nice warm houses, enjoy a hot shower and slip into a comfy bed. We take so much for granted.

And whilst this was a simple challenge for us, it is the daily reality for 32 million street children across Africa, not to mention the many homeless found tucked away in the North East. As a group we were overwhelmingly blessed by friends bringing us food and the local church providing us with cups of tea. Then there was the amount of food we managed to scavenge from the Tesco bins. Everyone was incredibly generous. But you can’t help but wonder why our reaction to a homeless guy sitting on the street corner would be any different. It’s all too easy to just look away and walk on by, preferring to remain in our comfortable bubble, when actually, simply stopping to say hello could make all the difference to that person’s day. What if we sacrificed one coffee trip a week and used the money to buy a sandwich for the homeless guy on the corner of the road instead? After all, Jesus said that “whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me.” (Matthew 25:40)

All the money we raised (nearly £700 to date) is going to Abaana’s street kid projects. Through their weekly outreach programme and their rehabilitation homes, Abaana hopes to change the lives for these kids, giving them the hope and the future that God has prepared for them. Thank you all so much for your support - for more information, please check out www.abaana.org. Our experience on the streets was eye opening and a challenge, and I think it will be a while before I complain about my college bedroom again!

32 million.

It’s estimated that there are nearly 32 million street children in Africa.

Just in Africa.

That’s not counting the number of kids in Brazil or Cambodia or India or even London who every day are forced to live on the streets, not knowing where their next meal is coming from.

It’s Christmas eve, when most children in the UK are consumed with excitement about what Santa is going to bring them tonight. A couple of years ago I spent my Christmas in Uganda with the street boys of Kampala, and although it’s cliché to say, it was the best Christmas of my life. These boys spend their days collecting plastic bottles and their evenings keeping out of the way of the police. Some are as young as 4 years old.

I’m not trying to be dramatic and holier-than-thou, it’s just something I’ve been thinking about. Abaana, a wee charity based in Bangor, held a sponsored 48 hour sleepout a couple of weeks ago in aid of their street kid projects, and so far they’ve raised about £7,000. That’s fantastic. I know the boys that this money is going to help, and it’s going to make such a difference.

I didn’t get to do the sleep out as I wasn’t home from uni, so my friend and I are going to do our own sleep out on the streets of Durham, 20th-22nd January. Please join us! Yes it will be cold and probably insanely difficult at times, but for 32 million children in Africa alone this is their reality.

I want to change that.

Maybe I can’t change it for every single street child all at once, but 1) our God is massive and 2) I can change the world for a few of these boys.

But I need your help please. Whether that be through joining us in sleeping out for one or two nights, donating money, bringing us food over that weekend or simply by praying, please do.

I just can’t get my head around that number. 32 million. Thirty-two MILLION.

Wow. x

ps…here’s the link to Abaana’s videos about it: http://www.streetreachafrica.org/video-gallery/test-gallery.php